Japan: Land of the Rising Sun... and Gingivitis.

Why won't anyone talk to me? I figured being the only white guy in a town would mean people would be staring at me, shaking my hand, throwing parades, etc. Not the case. No one will look at me. The white guy who lived in my apartment before me must have been like 7 feet tall with a penis on his forehead because my sudden arrival in the quiet town of Habikino has not made a stir. I am trying though. Some Japanese people really want to talk to me to practice their English and to learn about culture outside of Japan (Most know very little about other countries. One asked me if it was illegal for black people and white people to be friends in Canada). I've done a few language exchanges where you speak English for a while and then Japanese for a while. The Japanese part of these little exchanges usually consists of me staring blankly at the other person. Unfortunately, you get some weirdos with these exchanges. Enter Mariko. This girl, in our first conversation, came right out and told me that she never wanted to travel outside Japan, she's only trying to learn English for her job, and that the Roman alphabet is boring and dumb. Her life story was fairly depressing as well, to the point where I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Bouche: So, how is your family? Is it big or small?
Mariko: I am only child. My father was fired from job and my mother is sick in hospital.
B: Oh, I’m sorry. Do you work?
M: Yes I work. I wanted to work in Yokohama for a better job but I failed the test.
B: Ok. Um, do you have any friends?
M: Yes, I have two friends. Yoko has, um, mental problem? No, no, no, mental illness.
B: Oh, I’m sure she’s still nice. Does she live around here?
M: Oh no, she dead. She was killed in car crash 3 months ago.
B: Jesus. Alright, so do you have any living friends?
M: Yes, Noriko, she lives in Osaka.
B: That’s good, is she nice?
M: Yes, she is very nice sometimes. But sometime depressed too.
B: Oh God, why?
M: Her mother left when she was child and her father is in um, prison.
B: Wow. What does she do?
M: She is a, um, hocker? No, No. One second please. (Looks up in dictionary) Ah. A prostitute.
B: Oh......um,
M: Are you ok?
B: Yeah, I just um...bug in my eye.
M: Oh.
B: Ok, no more friends. Do you have any cousins or anything?
M: Yes, yes, yes. But I don’t see them, my uncle stole money from our family and left for south of Japan.
B: Ok, well I have to go....teach.....children.

So haven’t seen much of Mariko lately, I’m just assuming she has killed herself. I have also been trying to eat in restaurants more, hoping someone will want to talk but this has been largely unsuccessful. Once, when I was in a really busy restaurant, an old woman came in, and the waitress decided that she should be placed at my table with me. And I mean old. Like near death. So it was just me and this tiny 90-year-old Japanese woman eating some lunch together. I was trying to remember some Japanese, planning my conversation, when I looked over and discovered she was fast asleep. So my attempts to connect with the locals hasn’t been too successful but I’m working on it.
My work has definitely been getting better and working 3 hours a day is pretty sweet. Some kids are still horrible though. And we're not allowed to talk to the parents about them either, so when the parents come we have to smile and wave to the little shit who, for the past hour, has made you want stab him with a chopstick. One kid just went around viciously pinching the other kids necks. Like in the throat. And he wouldn’t stop. I think we should be able to talk to the parents a little at least, like, "Hey, yeah Yuka, um, stabbed some kid today. Pretty badly too. Don’t know if the other kid is going to pull through. She likes sharp objects, I’m a little scared. So just watch out for that. Oh! Look, she just stabbed you in the leg. Ok, well just, uh, keep an eye out ok?"
What else? Oh, the Japanese hate their teeth it would seem. Honestly, Japan has worse teeth than the NHLPA. Everyone has fucked up teeth. Either they are coming out at all different angles, or they are covered in plaque, or they are so bad they are actually black and you can see them rotting. And these aren’t poor Japanese people, these are the ones paying ridiculous sums of money for their children to get taught by some jackass like me. They just hate teeth. Either that or there are just no dentists. It’s distracting.
One thing I do love though, is that in every train station there is this tourist map with all the main attractions and stuff. And, without exception, on this map there will be all the elementary, junior high, and high schools clearly marked in English. So its like zoos, post offices, temples, shopping areas, and buildings where you can find little children.
Anyways, I went camping last weekend with some friends from training, which was different but very fun. Sushi and camping don’t really go well together though. It’s still damn hot here but the end is in sight and I get paid on Friday, which will help me out on the social side of things. I have a house number now, 050-1047-5638. Yeah that’s pretty much it. I’ve sent out a link for Japan pics and 2 videos from SE Asia.

Bouche


P.S. I’m kind of worried about my regularity. I’ve been living in my apartment for 6 weeks now and have only used up 3 rolls of toilet paper. It may be because I’ve always lived with family or roommates in the past so I don’t know how much I use personally. They might have just been big pooers (I’m looking at you Cmunk and Ms. Sellmann). But I think I might need more fibre. Thought Id keep you updated.